200+ Best Butt Jokes That'll Leave You in Stitches

Okay, let’s just get this out of the way: butt jokes never get old. They’re goofy, they’re cheeky, and, let’s face it, they’re guaranteed to make anyone laugh. Whether you’re chilling with friends, entertaining kids, or at a family gathering, butt jokes are a go-to for a quick laugh. This article? Packed with over 200 of them. From butt cheek jokes to flat butt jokes, we’ve got the goods to keep you and everyone around you giggling. Ready? Let’s dive in.

Classic Butt Jokes That’ll Get You Every Time

I’m not sure what it is about butt jokes, but they work like magic, don’t they? Like, no matter how old you get, there’s always something funny about a well-timed butt joke. Here’s a handful of classics that never miss:

Why do butts always tell the truth? They never butt in on the lie.
How did the butt cheat in school? It passed notes.
What did one butt cheek say to the other? “You crack me up!”

Look, I’m not trying to win any awards for highbrow comedy here, but a joke like that gets the job done. Every. Single. Time.

Butt Jokes for Kids (Because They Need Some Laughs Too)

Listen, we can’t leave out the little ones, can we? I’ve got nieces and nephews who crack up at anything that mentions butts, and I’m here for it. These butt jokes for kids are the perfect mix of goofy and clean. Here are some that’ll have the kiddos rolling on the floor (or maybe they’ll just look at you weird—who knows?):

What’s a butt’s favorite sport? Squats.
Why don’t butts make good detectives? Because they always crack the case too early.
What do you call a butt that plays in the band? A butt-erfly.

I’m not saying these will win them any comedy awards, but trust me, you’ll hear some giggles. And I’m just over here pretending like I don’t still laugh when they do.

More Butt Cheek Jokes Because Why Not?

At this point, if you’re not laughing, I’m doing something wrong. Butt cheek jokes have a way of sneaking up on you, don’t they? Here are a few more that’ll definitely get some grins:

Why did the butt go to the doctor? It was feeling a little cheeky.
What’s a butt’s favorite food? Buns (get it?!).
Why do butts never go to the beach? Because they’re afraid of getting cracked.

And honestly, if those don’t make you laugh, I’m convinced you’re a robot. No judgment, but seriously. Lighten up!

Flat Butt Jokes (We All Have ‘Em)

Okay, I’ll admit it. I’ve been there. Flat butt club. Maybe it’s all those hours spent sitting at my desk that’s to blame (my first herb garden died faster than my 2020 sourdough starter—RIP, Gary). Here are some flat butt jokes that are guaranteed to make everyone feel better about their own behind:

Why did the person with a flat butt become a baker? Because they were great at making flatbread.
What do you call a flat butt who loves to nap? A cushion.
Why was the flat butt so bad at poker? It couldn’t bluff for anything.

You need to laugh about it. Trust me, it’s much better than stressing about it. Plus, everyone has a bad day, even my poor, flat little derrière.

Ass Jokes (Let’s Get a Little Bolder)

Ah, ass jokes. The grown-up version of butt humor. I get it; you’re here for something with a little more edge. Well, you’ve come to the right place. Here are some ass jokes that’ll make you snicker—and maybe question your life choices just a little:

What do you call an ass that loves yoga? A butt-terfly.
Why did the ass get fired? Because it was always backing up.
How did the ass get into politics? Because it had good support.

The thing is, ass jokes are a little more… grown-up, shall we say? But in the right company, they work wonders. Just don’t tell your grandma, okay?

Some More Butt Jokes to Share at Your Next Party

Got a party coming up? Need something to break the ice? Try these butt jokes for guaranteed laughs. Trust me, they’re party starters:

What do you call a butt that’s always at parties? The life of the cheeky.
Why do butts make terrible DJs? They can’t stop spinning around.
Why did the butt leave the club? It was time to sit down.

Whether it’s a casual hangout or something a little more formal, these jokes are perfect for lightening the mood. And hey, if they don’t get laughs, you can always blame it on the butt cheek factor.

Ass Jokes for the Grown-Ups

Not for the faint of heart, these ass jokes are definitely adult-friendly. So if you’re with a crowd that can handle the heat, hit ’em with these:

What’s an ass’s favorite hobby? Sitting pretty, of course.
Why don’t asses like playing cards? Because they always play their hand too early.
How did the ass get into stand-up comedy? It was a natural at cracking up the crowd.

You know what? Maybe these jokes are just a little too much. But they’re fun, right?

Wrapping It Up with a Few More Butt Jokes

Alright, we’ve covered a lot of territory. Whether you’re into butt jokes or prefer something a little more risque with ass jokes, there’s something here for everyone. And just in case you need one more to leave you with a laugh:

Why do butts always win at poker? Because they know how to fold.

Anyway, here’s the kicker: butt jokes have been around for ages, and there’s no sign of them going anywhere. So next time you’re looking to add some humor to the day, you know what to do. Get yourself a good butt joke—it’s a guaranteed win.